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Jimmy







PostPosted: October 21, 2005 7:42 PM 

Cell Phone Cops: Lousy Thugs

Okay, let's get the obvious out of the way first. If you're swerving in and out of oncoming traffic on the way home from the bar, or you've just been seen driving over someone and leaving the scene, or you have a rocket launcher pointed out of the back of your vehicle, hopefully, someone with a cell phone will call the police and report you. "However," when the police catch up with you, they should be able to see for themselves if there is probable cause for stopping you, regardless of what some anonymous caller claims. Simple enough, right?

But I've been hearing some pretty outrageous stories about people using their cell phones to report other drivers cutting them off, speeding through residential neighborhoods, or even just reporting outright lies about someone who didn't allow them to merge in somewhere.

If police are actually stopping people for such reports, and it's now apparent that they are, they are doing all of us a huge disservice. Who's to say the alleged, cell phone-using "victim" wasn't, in fact, the "perpetrator" in an incident, and only using his or her phone to falsely accuse an innocent person of wrong-doing to get even? Did a woman break your heart recently?... No problem, tell the police she flew through a school crossing at 60 mph! If nothing else, she'll be stopped and inconvenienced for awhile. But what kind of an idiot would admit to any unsubstantiated claims even if they were true? "Excuse me sir, but we received a call that you appeared to be masturbating while driving a few miles back, is that true?" "Uhhh... Dammit! Who told on me?"

Sure, I'd love to see every maniac, who flies by me, stopped. But do I call and report license plates after the fact when I have no proof, and the police don't even know me, or what kind of a person I am, or what my motives are? No! How can the police be so sure that the cell phone caller isn't driving a stolen vehicle, or driving without a license, or driving around with some little kid tied up in the trunk? Just because some anonymous caller has a f**king cell phone it makes them Citizen of the Year? What's next for these people, becoming guests on Jerry Springer? Put your cell phones away, you dysfunctional f**ks, and get some therapy! And to the police... start locking up those who place such calls, instead of following up and encouraging them!

If I'm ever pulled over because somebody with a cell phone reported that I cut them off, or did anything that either never happened, or was already over and done with, that the police never saw me doing themselves, well... I just hope I'm not laughing so hard that the cop has trouble understanding me when I tell him I have no idea what he's talking about.... and to have a real nice day.

Next Week... "Cocktails: Stimulants or Play Toys?"

Bookman
Bad Breaker Upper

Posts: 3247

Reply: 1



PostPosted: October 21, 2005 9:50 PM 

What about the cell phone users? Who's watching them? When you're driving down the street/highway, and the car in front of you slows down and then speeds up. And then slows down and then speeds up. And meanwhile weaves back and forth in the lane, sometimes beyond the lane. And then you speed up to pass, to get yourself out of danger, and the driver is on the phone! Big surprise.

These people need to get pulled over once in awhile.

J. Chiles


Posts: 5078

Reply: 2



PostPosted: October 21, 2005 10:11 PM 

I want drivers on cell phones shot, and I want them shot NOW!

Jimmy
Pensky Material

Posts: 4301

Reply: 3



PostPosted: October 21, 2005 11:59 PM 

I can't believe the idiots I see all over the road who turn out to be on phones. But I have a theory about people who drive like shit when talking on cell phones. They drive like shit anyway!

I know people who can't adjust radios, heaters, light cigarettes, or do anything while driving. They're just idiots, plain and simple. Personally, I don't use my phone now when driving, but I did back when cell phones first became popular and I never had a problem. I've changed out of a complete suit into sweats and tennis shoes while driving without any problem. Granted, it's not safe, but my point is that you'd have never noticed if you were behind me. If one can drive with their elbow resting on the door and head leaning on their hand, and talk with a passenger next to them at the same time.... why can't they talk on a phone and drive?

Answer: Because they can't drive PERIOD!

Mookie
The Wiz

Posts: 945

Reply: 4



PostPosted: October 22, 2005 12:22 AM 

I'm watchin' the watchers

Jimmy
Pensky Material

Posts: 4301

Reply: 5



PostPosted: October 22, 2005 1:10 AM 

It's not so much the watching as the listening. I listen for them. And as I'm watching and listening I am also watching. You can't discount watching. It's sort of a combination. It's watching, and listening, listening and watching. But you must watch.

cousin jeffrey
Pimple Popper, MD

Posts: 1841

Reply: 6



PostPosted: October 24, 2005 12:32 AM 

While we're talking about cell phone users, how about those 14 year olds with cell phones. If I remember correctly, cell phones became popular because important business types were often away from their homes or office and needed to be reached. But suddenly half the cell phone conversations in the world today revolve around which classmate was talking smack about another classmate, or the new good charlotte album. Now cellphones are the newest self-esteem boosters, just like answering machines before them. Before, As Jerry would say, people wanted to come home to see that red light blinking, now they want to hear their "Ludacris" ringtone go off on the bus.

Gendison
Bad Breaker Upper

Posts: 3477

Reply: 7



PostPosted: October 24, 2005 7:26 AM 

I once got Happy New Year'd in March!

Yev Kassem
Wigmaster

Posts: 896

Reply: 8



PostPosted: October 24, 2005 8:56 AM 

Cell phones wont last. Once we realize that 65% of the population will develop ear-cancer in the next 20 years, they'll dig, they'll test.

Jimmy
Pensky Material

Posts: 4301

Reply: 9



PostPosted: October 24, 2005 5:15 PM 

I bought a cell phone for my dog for only $29.99 a month. You should see the way he just stares at it when I call him. Such a sweet kid.

Maestro
Cockeyed Optimist

Posts: 553

Reply: 10



PostPosted: October 26, 2005 12:54 PM 

I got the new Cellphone, Sony Ericson/Siemens D54/7TG-55A.B
This cellphone has everythin! I can call with it. And digital thingy and that noise....and pocket function. Adapter Yada Yada Yada, I'm very tired.

Gendison
Bad Breaker Upper

Posts: 3477

Reply: 11



PostPosted: October 26, 2005 1:37 PM 

It's just a glorified tip calculator.

Bookman
Bad Breaker Upper

Posts: 3247

Reply: 12



PostPosted: October 26, 2005 2:12 PM 

I'm ruined!

Mookie
The Wiz

Posts: 945

Reply: 13



PostPosted: October 26, 2005 4:54 PM 

It does other things!

Jimmy
Pensky Material

Posts: 4301

Reply: 14



PostPosted: October 26, 2005 8:58 PM 

Mine doesn't have a seven!

Maestro
Cockeyed Optimist

Posts: 553

Reply: 15



PostPosted: October 27, 2005 7:14 AM 

That's right, they are trying to eliminate the seven. You see it everywhere. Even the phone-companies are trying to lose the seven. When was the last time you had to dial a phone number with an seven in it?
You see, you didn't!

Gendison
Bad Breaker Upper

Posts: 3477

Reply: 16



PostPosted: October 27, 2005 6:37 PM 

Who's this chucker?

Jimmy
Pensky Material

Posts: 4301

Reply: 17



PostPosted: October 27, 2005 7:11 PM 

I don't eat that gooey crap.

Maestro
Cockeyed Optimist

Posts: 553

Reply: 18



PostPosted: October 28, 2005 2:39 PM 

I'll just eat what is in Jerry's Appartment.


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