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ShalrathESC







PostPosted: December 14, 2003 11:55 PM 

The Simpsons and Seinfeld are the best shows of all time!

My name is... well.... lets just call me D.M. Golby..... no no wait... scratch that, lets call me Dylan G. Where do I start... Steve, why Steve why?? Why cannot you spell, why? Ok, first off, I love my shotgun, I love my computer, and I love my fish girlfriend. I love the way Greena speaks so honest and negro-istic. He's my homie. I miss my old friend Legoman, I want to stroke his mono-brow, just once, I wanna touch it. Its beautiful.... and angular, and if Legoman was a gas, he'd be inert. Did I mention Kira, my ex-girlfriend, and tormentor... of my sick...sick twisted pycho brain. If only I could take Daniel McLeod's place in that noose on that tree. WHY? WHY WONT YOU ALL LET ME DIE! Anyways, back to Kira. I wont to see her, I want to touch her, I i want to hold her in my arms, closely, around the neck region, firmly, so so firmly, like a little guuuurrrrlll. Then kill her. Possibly with my weapon of choice, a long double-barrel shotgun. Touch my monkey!! Touch it! Dont leave him hanging! Like Daniel McLeod. Im so jealous, his agony, it must have been gorgeous. I love pain, I LOVE QUAKE!! I love my brothers sporophyte's, ALL OF THEM! I love the way children sound, when they sleep. It feels so good to get all this off my shoulders. I think about Kira everyday, I want to micturate with her. Once a strangeled her, another time I slapped her for no reason. The Matrix is good. I like threatening poeple around me, who care for me, with suicide. I have told many I will kill myself, but really i'm to much of a pussy to do it. Not like anyone would care, except my fish girlfriend. Here fishy fishy fishy... Her and her ferruginous ways are really starting to get on my nerves. Just writing this, I have orgasmed three times. Now I will pause for a moment, to brush my long beautiful golden hair. Arrrr, thats better. I pray for and end to my life. I quite enjoy watching Will & Grace. Once, I fantasized about another man. BUT JUST ONCE OK? I have recently build a small shrine to my love Kira, the fish didn't approve of this, so I slapped her, and locked her up again. She needs to respect me, and to love me, and to do something about that fishy odour she gives off. As i sit here writing this I am stroking my shotgun. I have to go now. One day I will leave this world, one day soon. In closing, fuck you Kira! Fuck you daddy for leaving me! And fuck you Leggoman.. I stole your bitch!!!!!

Champion7
Low-Talker

Posts: 1

Reply: 1



PostPosted: December 15, 2003 12:06 AM 

I agree with you Dylan, the simpsons and seinfeld are awesome. but they should have stopped making the simpsons about five years ago i reckon. Seinfeld stoped while it was still good, to quote Jerry he "quit the party while he was still having fun". And what the hell are you going on about in the rest of your blog. :?

DIAFF
Low-Talker

Posts: 1

Reply: 2



PostPosted: December 15, 2003 12:12 AM 

Shocked Shocked Shocked Shocked
Dylan you sound fucking up and should be locked up, away from society.

Wonder Wh?
Hipster Dufus

Posts: 48

Reply: 3



PostPosted: December 15, 2003 10:36 AM 

Maybe you should get some help, man. 'Serenity Now' is obviously not working for you.. Mad

russian
Low-Talker

Posts: 2

Reply: 4



PostPosted: December 19, 2003 1:27 AM 

Who the fuck is Daniel McLeod?

Daniel Mcleod
Low-Talker

Posts: 1

Reply: 5



PostPosted: May 8, 2004 1:52 AM 

I am Daniel McLeod. How dare you Dylan, i thought we'd sorted this out, dont you ever touch Kira again.

rio
Latex Salesman

Posts: 347

Reply: 6



PostPosted: May 8, 2004 10:44 AM 

....security!

Gack
Wigmaster

Posts: 809

Reply: 7



PostPosted: May 8, 2004 1:45 PM 

alright. i just got home from the bars. and i'm rather wasted at the moment. but still, i'm in a proper position, i think, to say that that was one of the most !@#$% up posts i've ever read. 'cept for the part about 'will & grace,' which does rock.

tell me it's not just cuz i'm bombed.

inge dorthe
Low-Talker

Posts: 1

Reply: 8



PostPosted: August 4, 2004 1:02 PM 

If you really want to something about your girlfriends fishy odour, then buy her a jar of LadyBalance, www.ladybalance.com

J. Chiles


Posts: 5139

Reply: 9



PostPosted: August 4, 2004 1:22 PM 

OK, I HAVEN'T seen it all! Rolling Eyes

Gendison
Bad Breaker Upper

Posts: 3306

Reply: 10



PostPosted: August 4, 2004 3:23 PM 

It's fucking sad when first cousins marry and re-produce.



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