Seinfeld Glossary
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"I am sorry" wave
Done when commiting a faux pas white driving to accept blame -- you raise the hand, lower the head as if to say - "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. The buttons are really big on the car. I don't understand it. I haven't read the manual" etc.
"Moses Smell the Roses"
Expression used by Jerry to express great feelings of emotion.
"This" & "That"
Term cretaed by Jerry and Elaine reffering to friendship and sex
"Ya that's right"
A phrase Putty often utters when someone asks him a question (especially one in which they are only asking to make sure they heard right the first time)
'89 LeBaron
Used vehicle purchased due to the fact that the previous owner was actor Jon Voight.
00
not "double zero," but "oooh oooh," as in oooh oooh aaah aaah (see koko)
12-gauge
The most popular gauge of shotgun that police use. Makes the 11-gauge look like a cap pistol.
129 West 81st Street Apt. 5A
Jerry's address.
129 West 81st Street Apt. 5B
Kramer's address.
129 West 81st Street Apt. 3A
Jerry's first address.
129 West 81st Street Apt. 5E
Newman's address
1st and 1st
Noun; The nexis of the Universe.
2 million Lira
Price in Italian currency for a villa in Tuscany from Cicio.
32
Jerry's actual pants size, although he does scratch off the 2 and replace it with a 1 so that everybody thinks he is a 31 waist
5'6"
George's real height, except when he wears Timberlands, which make him 5'8"
5-19
Police code for a possible auto theft.
555-FILK
Kramer's phone number, which frequently gets confused with 555-FILM, which is Movie Phone.
7
Name invented by George to honor Mickey Mantle and be an original name for his unborn child
7 and 5 eights
Jerry's hate size.
A Great Entrance
A dramatic way of entering a room for a party or fancy ball.
A Tell
When describing a date, if one touches the face,it means deception is taking place and "you gotta tell". The higher up on the face one touches, the worse the situation really is.
AM/PM
Setting on a clock radio that is sometimes entered incorrectly, causing one to oversleep.
Address Discrimination
Practiced particularly by food delivery organizations with delicious flounder, whereby they refuse to deliver an order beyond a specific boundary.
Agrabah
Magic word used by the Flying Sandoz Brothers to make things disappear
Airing of Grievances
One of the rituals of Festivus. (See also Feats of Strength)
Airport Pick-up
The most important of all pick-ups, nothing is more gratifying than a perfect airport pick-up.
Alcoholic Chicken
Product of Tyler Chicken and soon to be available at Yankee Stadium.
An "IT"
Girl of one's dreams. Lifelong companion. Synonym-The One
An "IT" (part 2)
The male reproductive organ. Elaine said: He took "IT" out.
An Enzo
A bad haircut.
Anti-Dentite
One who exhibits prejudiced feelings toward dentists, at times rabid feelings. May even believe they should have their own schools.
Anti-Dentite
Term used to refer to a people who is vehemently opposed to/or anything associated with dentists or dentistry.
Anytown, USA
Prototypical house in America, symbolized by the "front porch" set up by Kramer in the hallway. Often includes swinging bench, bug zapper, hanging plants, American flag and a storm door.
Arby’s
Low-class take-out sandwich restaurant preferred by Puddy. Menu items include roast beef sandwich.
Aristotle Goose Down Tunic
Fake Peterman product Elaine comes up with after running wild with an expense account.
Armoire
Piece of furnature that the Soup Nazi gives to Elaine but forgets his recipes are in it.
Assman
A really cool license plate belonging to Kramer (or some proctologist).
Astronaut Pen
Has an unusual quality in that it writes when turned upside down. Used by astronauts while traveling in space. Also useful while writing in bed, preventing the user from having to turn over and lean on his elbows.
Atomic Sub
Obscure sandwich franchise in New York area. Regularly provides cards wherein after the purchase of twelve crappy sandwiches, one automatically receives commission as a "sub-captain." A hat may or may not be involved.
Atomic Wedgie
A very rare form of the basic "wedgie" (see Wedgie)whereby the perpetrator extricates the waistband of the victims underwear to a point somewhere around the victims head. In extremely rare cases the elastic waistband may break off.
B-O-S-C-O
1) A chocolate-flavored syrupy liquid used as an additive to milk. 2) George's PIN code 3) Possible estranged lover of Mrs. Peterman
B.B.O.
Super potent, impossible to remove stench. Literally "beyond body oder"
B.L.
Beautiful Lineswoman.
(i.e. "Yeah, she's a B.L.")
BL
Beutiful Lineswoman a term used by george to describe a deaf lineswoman at the 92 US Open.
BTU
British Thermal Unit
Babka
A cake which comes in several flavors, most popular being chocolate or cinnamon; also with or without a hair attached. Has been known to cause small feuds in bakeries.
Baby
Extraneous term applied to the end of a statement to add more emphasis to that statement. Example: There's no precedent, baby!
Baby Blue
Son of Golden Boy.
Backslide
Situation whereby a couple that has broken up, gets back together. Often the backslide is preceded by the Bump Into (see Bump Into below).
Bad
Bad Breaker Upper
Someone who cannot end a relationship without offensive insults.
Bad Breaker Upper
person that means the bad things you say when you break up that you don't mean, often causes exes to become crazy and take violewnt acts against this person
Bad Date Situation
An event, such as a party, where bringing a companion would prohibit mingling with other attendees at the event.
Bad Naked
Unattractive actions performed in the nude such as crouching, coughing, straining to open a pickle jar or belt sanding. See Good Naked
Bad Seed
Undesirable person due to questionable upbringing, poor genetic inheritance or both
Bald Paradise
Period in 1920's where all men wore hats, therefore the women couldn't tell which guys were bald.
Bald again
A phenomenon in which a bald person who earlier used to crib about being bald starts realizing that he is not himself if he is not bald. That persons now wants to be bald and also want to date bald women
Baldist
A woman who has never gone out with a bald man, discrimination.
Baldist
A person who does not assoicate with bald people
Balm
A type of salve or ointment used to treat burns and abrasions.
ex. Who told you to put the balm on?
Barometer
It's pronounced thermometer.
Bastard
Friendly term used, mainly by people from Texas, instead of words like "Gentleman".
Beach, The
The Men's Colon Kramer creates to smell like you just came home from the ocean; this same idea was stolen from Kramer by Kalvin Klien
Beautiful Godzilla
A woman who based on looks alone can get anything she wants (example: such as tickets to a movie that has been sold out) and has never been seen carrying anything more than three pounds.
Beboppin' and scattin'
Phrase used by George Costanza to describe an insincere, insulting apology offered by recovering alcoholic Jason Hankey for an incident involving "a drafty apartment," "a sweaterless friend," and "a cheap, ballpark giveaway MetLife windbreaker."
Beef-A-Reeno
What a delicious cuisine-o
Fit for a king and queen-o!
Purchased in bulk at the "Price Club." Not recommended for horses.
Better Bring a Poncho
A term of advice offered to someone who plans to monitor the withdrawl of a junkie.
Big Boy
Full size Drake's coffee cake
Big Coarse Ha
Rough, boisterous type of laugh that is an undesirable trait in a female companion. (hated by Costanza)
Big Salad
A salad containing big lettuce, big carrots, and tomatoes like volleyballs.
Bizarro
An adjective meaning the exact opposite. Examples: Bizarro Jerry (reliable, considerate friend) and Bizarro Superman (says hello when he leaves and goodbye when he arrives).
Black SAAB
Name that Maroon GOLF calls Jerry during Puerto Rican Day
Black and White Cookie
1)Dessert food containing equal parts chocolate and vanilla; has been attributed to vomitting. 2)the key to racial harmony; "look to the cookie".
Blacklist
The act of not allowing an individual from being served by a company
Blurb
A short write-up in a newspaper or magazine.
Bob Sacamano
The friend of Kramer, Who is yet to be seen.
Boca Breeze
The newsletter at Del Boca Vista (Phase Three) -- a "Pinko Commie rag"
Bomb Defusing Robot
A person, such as your irritating uncle, who you have to open up your packages that you may suspect to be bombs.
Bombable
The level of celebrity one achieves where he or she may be the victim of a bomb of any sort.
Bootros Bootros Golly
An exclamation of astonished joy. Possible use would be when a man witnesses a woman sunbathing topless on a beach in the Hamptons.
Bosco
The purest chocolate "syrup nectar" enjoyed by George. It stained a sweater of his and was his ATM code. Also used by Kenny Banya in a comedy bit.
Botticellis
Fashionable dress shoes worn by Elaine and coveted and discussed by others
Bottle-Wipe
A subconscious act which negatively indicates the degree of attraction between two people. Supercedes the open-lip kiss!
Boutros Boutros-Ghali
1. A former secretary General of the United Nations. 2. What Jerry exclaims when seeing a topless sunbather.
Boys
Euphemism for testicles or sperm
Bra-less Wonder
1)A slang term used against a female who is well endowed in the pectoral region and refuses to wear the recommended undergarment 2)Sue-Ellen Mishke
Break-out, Pop-in
the unannounced visit from a girlfriend who just broke out of prison that is typically frowned apon.
Breakup by Association
Situation in which one can no longer be friends with another because that person has broken up with one's friend.
Breath Taking
A word used to politely describe someone who is ugly
Breath Taking
An word used to politely describe someone who is ugly
Bris
An ancient Jewish ceremony where a male child is circumcised. A sacred covenant between G-d and Abraham, or something...
(see Mohel)
Bro, The
A support undergarment specifically designed for men.
Bruline
Tennis racket preferred by Mr. Pitt, Ms. Landers and Newman.
Bubble Boy!!!!! you all forgot
Bubble Boy!!!!! you all forgot bubble boy!!!! :roll:
Buck Naked
If George was a porn star, this would be his name
Buffer
A region of separation between parents and their children
Buffer Zone
The mean separation between one's parents and themself. The greater the buffer zone, the greater the quality of life
Buffer Zone (2)
A desired distance between yourself and others for any number of reasons. Used in context in The Chinese Restaurant.
Bump Into
Situation whereby a couple that has broken up unexpectedly encounters one another. This can at times lead to a Backslide. See Backslide above.
Bunion Stories
Purchased by Kramer from Newman, to replace stories sold to J. Peterman. Price: eight bucks.
Busting
An implication of being overwhelmed with joy and/or good fortune
Butter Shave
Alternative method of shaving. Reportedly vastly superior than any commercial shaving cream. Warning: Avoid exposure to prolonged sunshine after application of the butter.
Cable boy
Kramer's nick-name for Jerry when he agrees to have illegal cable installed by Kramer's friends.
Caffe Latte
Half coffee, half milk hot drink that Seinfeld helped to become one of the most widely consumed drinks in the world.
Caligula
Roman Emperor from 37-41 CE. Mentally unbalanced, neglected affairs of state so as to better indulge in his passions. Jerry used this term to refer to George when trying to combine his three loves, food, sex and television.
Call waiting face-off
A phone call is interrupted by another call waiting...the person fielding both calls is forced to make a decision between the two.
Calzone
Dough pocket filled with pizza toppings and sauce.
Candy Line-up
Similar to a police line-up except that candy bars are used instead of possible crime suspects. Candy bars are set up unwrapped with the intention of determining a persons ability to identify a specific candy bar. Candy line-ups have been known to disappear before the identification process takes place.
Cape Weather
A day characterized as cool and breezy, ideal conditions for wearing a cape.
Cashmere
Expensive, finely-knit fabric considered extremely desirable by foreign cleaning women. Also prized by Elaine Benes, Jason Hankey, and George Costanza.
Cassus Belli
Meaningless Latin phrase that Elaine likes to say out loud
Cell Phone Walk-n-Talk
Conversation one has on their mobile phone to kill time as they walk to their destination.
Cherish the Cabin
Susan Ross's grandfather's last words to her father before he died.
Cherry Binaca
Breath spray that can also be used in place of pepper spray or mace in certain situations.
Chewing the fat
What Jerry and his imaginary butcher Franco do. While doing this, Franco came up with the line "Salad's got nothing on this Mutton".
Chow Fung
A big flat noodle.
Chucker
One who foists an excessive number of ill-advised shots in a basketball game. (Pronounced by George as "Chuckah").
ex. Who's the chucker?
Chuckle
A jelly candy that comes in five flavors
Chunky
A chocolate candy bar that, if left in an apartment, will lead to the inundation of fleas
Cinnamon
According to Jerry: It should be on tables at restaurants along with salt and pepper. Anytime anyone says, "Oh This is so good. What's in it?" The answer invariably comes back, Cinnamon. Cinnamon. Again and again.
Clapgo D-29
An impenetrable dead-bolt lock. Has only one functional requirement. THE DOOR MUST BE CLOSED!
Clapko 3000
The most inpenetrablelock on the market today (according to Jerry)
Clarkman Garbage Disposal
In addition to being installed in the sink, can also be installed in the shower drain. This allows one to shower and prepare a meal at the same time.
Cleaner
One who makes problems go away. (ie. Muffin stumps)
Cleavage
If one sees cleavage, then it is followed by a touch, then the touchee will look, not to be confused with a stare or "good look"
Close Talker
A person who stands extremely close to another person when speaking to that person.
Club Soda with No Ice
Beverage served at the Hotel Westbury. (See also Cranberry Juice with Two Limes).
Cocoa
"Alright chimp" according to Puddy; The name that George is given after losing "T-Bone" to another employee; The name of the employee George hires so that he wouldnt have the Cocoa name anymore, but instead is given the nickname "Gammy".
Coffee
In the morning, coffee is coffee. At 12 midnight, coffee is sex.
Collectible
Something cherished or valuable that is being saved for the future - like a TV Guide.
Commando 450
Most powerful shower head used by circuses purchased by Kramer and Newman to combat "low flow"
Commando 8
Brand of air conditioner perfect for a small apartment. Easy to install.
Conjugal Visit Sex
Sex with a convict. Ranks above Make-Up sex and below Fugitive sex in terms of desirability
Conjugal Visit Sex
Sex with a convict still within the bounds of jail or prison. Ranks above make-up sex and below fugitive sex in terms of desirability
Consolation Guy
One who offers solace in a bereavment situation. Being the consolation guy is like getting ten dates in one shot and confers instant boyfriend status.
Core, Art
Fake name which would eventually trun into Art Vandalay
Costanza
see: lord of the idiots
Cotton Dockers
Tan trousers whose commercials may or may not annoy you.
Cougar 9000
Rolls Royce of wheelchairs. Has inductive joystick, dynamic braking, flip up arms. Rated #1 by Hospital Supply and Prosthetic Magazine
Counter-Clockwise Swirl
Perfect finish to a supposedly foolproof sexual move which if mastered, will guarantee one will never be alone again
Coup Dé Toe
When the second toe outgrows the big toe captain and gains control of the foot
Covenant Of The Keys
An agreement generally made by neighbors whereby each participant maintains a key to the other's dwelling. The key is to be used for emergency purposes only such as a lockout. Misuse of the key (e.g. unexpected pop-ins) can result in one losing key privileges.
Crab Bisque
Creamy and semi-thick seafood soup that makes your knees buckle.
Cranberry Juice with Two Limes
Beverage served at the Hotel Westbury. (See also Club Soda with No Ice.)
Crazy Joe Davola
A physcotic that kicks Kramer in the head after not being invited to his party and tries to sabatoge the filming of "Jerry"; goes out with Elaine and dresses up as a clown to go to the opera.
Crook Eye
Dirty look or stare aimed at someone you wish ill upon. In the same family as Stink Eye and Evil Eye
Cruisewear
Vintage clothing appropriate for vacation.
Cue-ballectomy
Not the medical terminology for a hair transplant.
Curse Toast
A toast at a formal occasion which contains profanity. May clear the room and/or get you in a headlock
Cut to the chase
A Hollywood phrase that was used by old-timers such as Milton Berle.
Dark and Disturbed
Quality that some women find attractive in a man.
Dating Loophole
A loophole guys utilize to ask women out without fearing getting rejected.
Day-After Thank You
Courtesy phone call made to express one's gratitude for complimentary tickets to an event the previous evening.
De-Sour
Active effort made to overcome a previous disenchantment with a partner. Often it is not enough to merely de-sour. One must sweeten too
Death Blow
When someone tries to blow you up, not because of who you are,
but for different reasons altogether
Decomposing
What Jerry refers to as George's way of preparing for "the Summer of George".
Decompressing
A period of preparation required before beginning the "Summer of George." Also see, "Summer of George" and "Frolf."
Deep fried in Chocolat sauce
Phrase used to refer to a food item so terrible that it would never be eatable. i.e Broccoli for Newman.
Degifting
The process of giving a gift and then asking the recipient to return it. Example: You know those super bowl tickets I gave you earlier? Can I have them back? It turns out that I can use them after all.
Del Boca Vista
Retirement community in Florida where Jerry`s parents live.
Denogginizer, The
One of the names proposed by the police to describe the Lopper
Denoginizer
"Prospective name for the serial killer terrorizing Riverside Drive by decapitating his victims. (See Son of Dad)
Desperado
A favorite song of one of Elaine`s boyfriends. When he hears it he freezes up and is not distracted by anything until it is over.
Details
Details
Rundown of events leading up to and or continuing through a sexual escapade
Difficult
An unruly patient. Elaine was labelled "difficult" by multiple doctors.
Dingo
A creature responsible for consuming your missing fiance...the poor baby!
Dinky Donuts
Donut establishment frequented by Joe Dimaggio.
Director's Chair
A type of chair that could be used as a seat for a security guard being forced to stand. (may be interpreted as a pompous look)
Do Me A Solid
Cool and hip term which means 'Do Me a Favor'.
Dolores
Actual name of Jerry's girlfriend. Rhymes with a part of the female anatomy.
Dominicans
Unacceptable substitute for Cubans.
Double Crunch
A popular cereal usually requested by Kramer.
Double park
The act of parking next to another car on a street, trapping it between the curb and the car next to it. Its how dictatorships start.
Double-dip
To place ones entire mouth into the dip. Just take one dip, then end it.
Double-dipping
A specific technique of eaching chips. You take a dip with your chip, take a byte and dip it again
Dr. Von Nostrand
Kramer's alter ego.
Dr. Von Nostrand
Kramer's alter ego.
Dr. Von Nostrand
Kramer's medical alter ego.
Drake's Coffee Cakes
A delicious treat that will cost you more than 50 cents, but can make anyone break their fast (or at least, Elaine).
Dream Cafe
Restaurant run by a Pakistani immigrant. Frequented only by Jerry Seinfeld.
Dream Cafe
A cafe across the street from Seinfeld's apartment, run by a Pakistani immigrant named Babu Baaht.
Dream Spot
The most ideal and perfect parking space possible.
Drivel Parts
Sections of a novel which are drivel.
Egg White Omelet
Healthy alternative to a regular omelet.
Entenmann's shim-sham "The"
One of the oldest baker's grift in the books. Involves substituting a piece of Entenmann's for vintage pastry to scam an unsuspecting pastry investor.
Euromysitisis
Condition in which not urinating could result in poisoning and possible death.
European Carryall
A purse for men.
Exclamation Point
a symbol used at the end of a sentence to imply exclamation, can be offensive if not used in the correct places.
Excuse Rolodex
Rolodex used to provide excuses for avoiding outings, meetings, conversations or general get togethers with annoying childhood friends you were only friends with in the first place because they had a ping pong table.
Executive, The
Vintage, belt-less over coat designed by Morty Seinfeld.
Extra MSG
An additive for chinese food, especially pea pods.
FDR
Initials of Kramer's friend Franklin Delano Romanowski - not to be confused with a former president of the United States.
Face Painter
A person who paints their face with their favorite sports teams colors and/or logos to support the team.
Fake Erase
The act of pretending to erase a comment written in a medical record such as someone being "difficult" with a pencil that was originally written with a pen.
Fake Number
A number given to an undesirable potential date.
False Reflecting
The image that skinny mirrors gives one. One looks better in the mirror than in reality.
Fancy Boy
A man who wears a fur and carries a European Carryall.
Feats of Strength
One of the rituals of Festivus. (See also Airing of Grievances)
Femininas
Kramer-speak for lovely ladies
Festivus
Festivus is a holiday celibrated on December 23, created by Frank Costanza and was made as a response to commercialism of the other December holidays. Slogan- "Festivus, a holiday for the rest of us".
Festivus
A holiday that Frank Costanza made up because he did not like all the advertisements and holiday jingles for all other holidays. It is celebrated on December 23rd. Slogan-"A Festivus for the rest-iv-us!"
Flabby Armed Spanking Machine
Situation one encounters when trying to swim in a pool when a large group of elderly people are having an aquatics class.
Flagged book
A book taken into a public resroom. Once "flagged," a book cannot be returned to the store for credit or donated to charity. In George's case the book was "French Impressionist Paintings."
Flavin
A term used in place of any other word in any context in times of drawing blanks
Flinty
a description of a woman's voice; deep, throaty and seductive. (Call a 976 chick and you'll hear it)
Fly off the Handle
1) Something certain Asian mailmen do when asked for directions to the local Chinese Restaurant. 2) Something Jerry does NOT do when asked which way is Israel
Forbidden City
Mythic place where a secret tribe of beautiful women reside. To get inside the walls, one must prove that one has had a relationship with one of their own. Not to be confused with a meat packing plant
Forcible Massage
Desperate act of trying to physically coerce a massage from someone. See Massage Teaser
Freckle's Ugly Cousin
Mole
Fresh "Out of the Dryer" Feel
The reason Kramer sticks his shirts in the oven
Friend- in- law
A friend of a friend is your friend-in-law. Sometimes also referred to as a friend by association
Friends O' Clyde
Jerry's first softball team
Fright-Night
Time period in which ugly people walk the streets of Manhattan.
Frolf
a game formed from a combination of frisbee and golf, played during the 'Summer of George'
Frolf
A game george has always wanted to play. Frisbee golf. Golf played with a frisbee.
From Nods to Nothing
Final stage of an acquaintanceship when passing acknowledgement is extinguished and one ignores the presence of another
Fudge Distribution
Something accomplished when the fudge is placed at the bottom of the ice cream sundae so one can control how much fudge one eats in each bite.
Fugitive Sex
sex with your girlfriend who just broke out of prison. said to be better than conjugal visit sex or make up sex.
Full-turn
A move employed in a movie theater usually combinded with the "eye roll." This technique is usually employed after the "half-turn" fails to quiet the talkative people sitting behind one in a theater.
Funeral Hello
A greeting given at a somber occasion, specifically a funeral, that lacks the enthusiasm of a regular hello.
Fungi
The pulral of fungus.
Fungicide
Cream used to clear up a fungus. Usually located in one's medicine cabinet.
Fusilli Jerry
One in a series of pasta personalities that Kramer created wherin the particular noodle used reflects the person's persona. ie. fusilli because jerry is silly.
see Macaroni Midler
Fuzz, The
The Fuzz: slang: the police, used by newman
Gabardine
Material generally found in off-the-rack and/or vintage slacks preferred by Kramer. When Kramer is "out there and loving every minute of it," this is all that separates him from the public.
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Gammy
Jamaican slang for grandmother
Gatzby Swing Top
A bra that instead of being worn underneath a piece of clothing is instead worn as a top. Can be purchased from the J. Peterman Company. Designed by Elaine Marie Benes.
Gay
someone who is neat, thin, and clean (not that there is anything wrong with that)
Germaphobe
One who fears germs and those who carry them like promiscuous women who wear slippers that are bacteria traps.
Get Out
Phrase in which the speaker displays his or her state of disbelief.
Get Outta Here
Phrase one wants to hear from one's doctor after asking about a serious illness. For example; "Do I have cancer?" "Cancer? Get outta here!"
Giddy-up
A phrase indicating agreement or an urging to proceed.
ex. Will you take $500 for it? Giddy-up.
Gingaa
Term of derision used by Kramer. Can be used interchangably with Mojombo.
Goiter
Non-cancerous enlargement of the thyroid gland, which can appear as a football-shaped protuberance jutting out of the neck.
Golden Boy
The first shirt in the cycle that Jerry wears after doing laundry.
Good Naked
Graceful actions performed while in the nude such as hair brushing. See Bad Naked
Gore-tex
Popular material used to make winter coats.
Got-no-Green Lantern
A super-hero like male acquantance who is invulnerable to creditors due to lack of funds.
Grease Monkey
Derogatory term for auto mechanic
Gyro
Savoury takeaway roll, can be purchased at subway stations. Not recommended for eating with cherished tv guide collectibles
Ha-Ho
Term used as an expression of anger, or excitement.
Also used when information is discovered that produces anger
Ha-Ho
Term used as an expression of anger, or excitement.
Also used when information is discovered that produces anger
Hair Hat
Slang for toupé along with rug, piece, and bird's nest
