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Jerry and Puddy: High 5...

This Seinfeld sound bite has been removed due to a DMCA request from the copyright owners of Seinfeld.

JERRY: Hey, Elaine, have you noticed your boyfriend has developed an annoying little habit?
ELAINE: The squinting?
ELAINE: The staring?
JERRY: No. He keeps asking me to give him a high-five.
ELAINE: I thought all guys do that.
JERRY: Slapping hands is the lowest form of male primate ritual. In fact, even some of them have moved on - they’re doing sign language now.
ELAINE: It’s that bad?
JERRY: What do you think the Nazis were doin’? That was the heil-five.
ELAINE: Isn’t that from your act, like, ten years ago?
JERRY: It was a good bit in the ‘80’s, and it’s still relatable today.

(Puddy approaches them)
PUDDY: Good news. We got a 900 in black. That’s the hot color. (Holds up his hand) High-five.
(Elaine and Jerry exchange looks)
ELAINE: Um, David, you know what? Can you come help me fix the copy machine? Come.
PUDDY: (Pointing at Jerry) You owe me five.

This Seinfeld sound bite has been removed due to a DMCA request from the copyright owners of Seinfeld.

[Scene cuts to Puddy in the copy room with Elaine. He’s trying to fix the Xerox machine]

PUDDY: Paper jam.. Got it!
PUDDY: High-five. On the flip side.
ELAINE: David, um, I..
PUDDY: (Still holding out his hand) Don’t leave me hangin’.
ELAINE: You’re a salesman now - and the high-five is… it’s very “grease monkey.”
PUDDY: What did I tell you about that?
ELAINE: Ah, I, I’m sorry, but the high-five is just so stupid.
PUDDY: Oh yeah? I’ll tell you what’s stupid. You. Stupid.
ELAINE: Oh, that is really mature.
PUDDY: Yeah? So are you. You’re the grease monkey.
ELAINE: Uh… that doesn’t make any sense. I am leaving.
PUDDY: Yeah, if you leave, we’re through.
ELAINE: Fine! We’re through!
PUDDY: Oh, so you’re leaving?
ELAINE: (While leaving) That’s right. High-five! On the flip side! (As Elaine is leaving, she mutters to herself) Takin’ me to Arby’s…

JERRY: (Sees Elaine leaving) Hey! Wh-where are you…?
(She exits. Puddy sits down at his desk - disturbed)
PUDDY: Let’s finish this up.
JERRY: Did you two break up?
PUDDY: (While punching up numbers on a calculator) That chick’s whacked. We’re history. (Back to the transaction) I just left out a couple of things: uh, rust-proofing…
JERRY: "Rust-proofing"?
PUDDY: (Reading off what he’s adding up on the calculator) Transport charge, storage surcharge, additional overcharge, finder’s fee…
JERRY: "Finder’s fee"? It was on the lot!
PUDDY: Yeah, that’s right. Uh, floor mats, keys…
JERRY: “Keys”?!
PUDDY: How ya gonna start it?

posted at March 19, 2004 11:03 AM

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