Seinfeld DVD Complete Series Box Set

Seinfeld Script Search:

The Calzone

Author Message
Stan The Caddy

PostPosted: September 20, 2003 9:51 PM 

gs: John D'Aquino (Todd) Peter Allas (Counter Guy) Danette Tays (Nicki) Greg Collins (Policeman) Jane A. Johnston (Todd's Mother) Wayne Knight (Newman)

George becomes Steinbrenner's pet, when he shares an eggplant calzone with him. Kramer is raving about wearing clothes "straight out of the dryer." Jerry thinks that Elaine's boyfriend is dating her without really ever asking her out. He offers to bring Jerry some Cuban cigars from Canada. Jerry takes advantage of his girlfriend's ability to get anything she wants. Kramer searches for quarters for the dryer; when he can't find anymore, he starts using an oven. George gets into tip trouble with the counter guy at the calzone shop and he works out an arrangement with Newman. That is unless of course it's raining (Newman doesn't deliver mail in the rain); Kramer helps out.

b: 25-Apr-96 pc: 720 w: Alec Berg & Jeff Schaffer d: Andy Ackerman


Posts: 1

Reply: 1

PostPosted: October 13, 2003 10:19 AM 

is george S. Larry david?

Andrew Weaver

Posts: 2

Reply: 2

PostPosted: October 13, 2003 5:15 PM 

Larry David does the voice but not the actual acting. Larry David only physically played Steinbrenner in "The Opposite." After that they hired an actor to play him, but Larry David still did the voice overs.

karma kramer
Bob Sakamano

Posts: no

Reply: 3

PostPosted: May 13, 2004 7:27 PM 

ok in this episode, at the end when elaine and jerry are smoking the cigars on his couch, and she asks him what happened to paying the guy for the cigars, and he said "its being taken care of" and you see kramer throw the sack of pennies at the guy. What is that scene trying to allude to, mafia activity or something? and what is with the smoking of the cigars, elaine says something and jerry is like "whats that?". the same thing happens in the karate eposide when jerry is talkin with elaine on the phone and she is smoking a cigar and she says "its a peach" and jerry says "whats that?" its an allusion to something, i just cant think of what...please help

The Puffy Shirt
Bob Sakamano

Posts: no

Reply: 4

PostPosted: August 13, 2004 6:28 PM 

George: You know how these interoffice politics work.
Jerry: No. I never had a job.

Cop: I got you on the radar at 93 miles per hour.
Jerry: You must have gotten me when I slowed down to take that curve because for a while there I was doing well over 100.

Kramer: This is all burned up. Look at this.
Worker: What the hell do I know about cooking a shirt?

Some great stuff. Very Happy

the soup nazi

Posts: 1

Reply: 5

PostPosted: March 24, 2005 5:48 PM 

in that episode "the calzone"
what is the place that George goes to get the calzones called.

i dont know if it's mentioned of not

Bad Breaker Upper

Posts: 3306

Reply: 6

PostPosted: March 24, 2005 6:52 PM 

I think it's "Pisano's" but I'm not sure if that's the spelling.

Bob Sakamano

Posts: no

Reply: 7

PostPosted: April 22, 2005 2:49 AM 

spelled pizano w/ a Z probably

Todd Gac

Posts: 1

Reply: 8

PostPosted: May 16, 2005 6:01 PM 

Believe it or not, Alec Berg (friend of a friend of mine) got my name on the "Calzone" episode years ago. Getting lots of mileage out of it. People I meet who ask my name almost immediately say, "They used that name in a Seinfeld episode once". You almost wonder how many people have heard your name. So the next time you watch any re-runs of Seinfeld and you hear the Calzone episode, listen for Todd Gac and chuckle how he actually wrote into this web address with a stupid comment like this.

Mr. Bookman
Bob Sakamano

Posts: no

Reply: 9

PostPosted: June 9, 2005 1:24 PM 

I noticed a mistake in the script as posted here: "Pigstein what's an eggplant calzone" should be "Big Stein wants an eggplant calzone."

cousin jeffrey
Vile Weed

Posts: 1714

Reply: 10

PostPosted: June 9, 2005 2:40 PM 

There are plenty of mistakes in just about all the scripts.
But who could mistake Big Stein for Pigstein? Obviously someone who's on crack or some kind of drug anyway.

Bob Sakamano

Posts: no

Reply: 11

PostPosted: June 21, 2005 5:42 PM 

Just saw this episode! Funny as hell! Very Happy

Bob Sakamano

Posts: no

Reply: 12

PostPosted: July 16, 2005 10:06 PM 


Jay Remanschneider

Posts: 1

Reply: 13

PostPosted: July 23, 2005 9:43 AM 

I think this is one of the best episodes of Steinfeld!

Bert Harbinson

Posts: 13

Reply: 14

PostPosted: November 16, 2005 6:04 PM 

WHy does Jerry say he never had a job, when most of the early episodes you see him on stage WORKING?

Bert Harbinson

Posts: 13

Reply: 15

PostPosted: November 16, 2005 6:09 PM 

Is that some kind of insult to the guy at Paizanos when Kramers offers change but they exchange words and then Kramer turns around and kicks the counter top backwards.

John Germaine
Hipster Dufus

Posts: 48

Reply: 16

PostPosted: November 16, 2005 7:38 PM 

It was some kind of insult. But not a traditional Italian one if that's what you were thinking.


Posts: 2

Reply: 17

PostPosted: August 11, 2006 9:09 PM 

This question is about the episode where jerry has a dispute with an old acquaintance from school with hwom he had a foot-race. They argue about who won and he says to jerry "You couldn't beat me then and you can't beat me now." Jerry's girlfriend then says "race him Jerry. Race him!"
Is her line from an old movie like American Graffiti or something? I have looked around and can't find any clues.

master of my domain

Posts: 11

Reply: 18

PostPosted: October 19, 2006 5:41 PM 

Jerry : With you two guys at the helm. The last piece of the puzzle is in place.

George : So let me ask you a question about the tip jar. I had a little thing with the calzone guy this week. I go to drop a buck in the tip jar and just as I am about to drop it in he looks the other way. And then when I am leaving he gives me this look think thanks for nothing. I mean if they don't notice it what's the point.

Jerry : So you don't make it a habit of giving to the blind.

George : Not bills.


Posts: xxx

Reply: 19

PostPosted: May 25, 2014 10:35 AM 

who was Todd Gack's dad?? His mother is listed on line, but no mention of the dad. He was in the restaurant for "the date", and he looks familiar, but never a mention anywhere I can find.

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Copyright ©2003, Mark Carey.