Seinfeld DVD Complete Series Box Set

Seinfeld Script Search:

The Fatigues

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Stan The Caddy

PostPosted: September 21, 2003 9:18 PM 

gs: Joe Urla (Dugan) Ned Bellamy (Eddie) A.J. Langer (Abby) Katie Layman (Cynthia) Eddie Allen (Doctor) Gwen McGee (Janine) Lynn Manning (Blind Man) Estelle Harris (Estelle) Jerry Stiller (Frank) Richard Herd (Wilhelm) Steve Hytner (Bania)

Jerry is intrigued by the concept of his girlfriend having a mentor. George prepares to give a lecture on risk management by reading a book, but realizes that book on tape have spoiled him. Elaine prepares to fire an employee, but when face to face with him, she promotes him. Kramer runs a Jewish singles night at Frank's Knights of Columbus hall. Jerry meets his girlfriend's mentor, but she is dating Kenny Bania. George discovers the blind can get any book on tape, so he plans to fail an eye test. Elaine's recently promoted employee has some startling new ideas. She plans to promote him again. Kramer's party plans go awry when he has to cook for over 150 plus people. He needs to get Frank's advice on cooking for the masses, despite George's warning. Elaine's promotional plan backfires, when the rest of her staff quits. Jerry's girlfriend sees Bania's act and loses respect for her mentor. Elaine tries working with her employee. George figures out an angle to get his book read. Jerry finds himself becoming Bania's mentor. Jerry and his now ex-girlfriend get their files mixed up; George speaks on Ovaltine and Bania on risk management. Frank's cooking skills are reborn, until he sees someone choking.

b: 31-Oct-96 pc: 806 w: Gregg Kavet & Andy Robin d: Andy Ackerman


Posts: 4

Reply: 1

PostPosted: January 19, 2004 5:00 PM 

Two of my favorite lines from this episode are:
"I'm like a Phoenix rising out of Arizona"

and when Frank says, "I'm back babayyyyyyyyyyyy"

J. Chiles

Posts: 5139

Reply: 2

PostPosted: January 19, 2004 5:53 PM 

That's gold Jerry, GOLD!

My son splits a gut everytime this one comes on, partially because of the line and partially the look on Banya's face as the Ovaltine/Roundtine concept sinks in and he reacts. It has become a catch phrase in our household everytime something really good comes along, "That's gold, GOLD!"

Even later, with the Risk Management material, Banya says, "Aw it's just gold Jerry, gold...."


Posts: 1

Reply: 3

PostPosted: January 28, 2004 4:36 AM 

so what was the joke that jerry says about ovaltine? The full quote would be good

H.E. Pennypacker
Bob Sakamano

Posts: no

Reply: 4

PostPosted: January 28, 2004 6:37 AM 

"Why do they call it Ovaltine? The mug is round. The jar is round. They should call it round tine."


Posts: 1

Reply: 5

PostPosted: June 15, 2004 10:33 AM 

By chance, does anyone know the name of the song that plays whenever Frank reminisces about cooking for his fellow soldiers? It is a classical song, slow, minor key. Been trying to figure it out for years. Feel free to e-mail with the answer. Thanks!

Bob Sakamano

Posts: no

Reply: 6

PostPosted: June 15, 2004 10:02 PM 

It's a hot night. The mind races. You think about your
knife; the only friend who hasn't betrayed you, the only friend who won't be
dead by sun up. Sleep tight, mates, in your quilted Chambray nightshirts.

Bob Sakamano

Posts: no

Reply: 7

PostPosted: June 19, 2004 11:56 PM 

"It's a hot night. The mind races. You think about your
knife; the only friend who hasn't betrayed you, the only friend who won't be
dead by sun up. Sleep tight, mates, in your quilted Chambray nightshirts."

lmao! I crack up with this one


Posts: 1

Reply: 8

PostPosted: June 23, 2004 8:50 PM 

n-webster, it's the theme from platoon. barber's "adagio for strings".

Bob Sakamano

Posts: no

Reply: 9

PostPosted: December 23, 2004 4:28 PM 

My favorite exchange:

Frank: "Well it sucks!"

Estelle: "What did you say?"

Frank: "Your meatloaf is mushy, your salmon croquets are oily and your eggplant parmesan is a disgrace to this house!"


Posts: 1

Reply: 10

PostPosted: March 9, 2005 9:46 PM 

The funniest part was when george had risk management on tape and it sounded exactly like him.

Condo Board President

Posts: 2988

Reply: 11

PostPosted: March 9, 2005 10:22 PM 

It's tough keepin' your feet dry when you're kickin'-in a skull.

Bob Cobb
Bob Sakamano

Posts: no

Reply: 12

PostPosted: April 2, 2005 8:11 PM 

"Tell that to Bobby Colby. All he wanted to do was go home. Well he went home all right-with a crater in his colon the size of a cutlet. No. I'll never cook again!"

- No labels, Jerry. You know what that means? Freebies!

Posts: 1

Reply: 13

PostPosted: May 20, 2006 11:26 AM 

Frank = Inchon, Korea, 1950. I was the best cook Uncle Sam ever saw, slinging hash for the Fighting 103rd. As we marched north, our supply lines were getting thin. One day a couple of GIs found a crate, inside were six hundred pounds of prime Texas steer, at least it once was prime. The Use date was three weeks past, but I was arrogant, I was brash, I thought if I used just the right spices, cooked it long enough...

Kramer = What happened?

Frank = I went too far. I over seasoned it. Men were keeling over all around me. I can still hear the retching, the screaming...
I sent sixteen of my own men to the latrines that night. They were just boys.

Kramer = Frank, you were a boy too. And it was war. It was a crazy time for everyone.

Frank = Tell that to Bobby Colby. All that kid wanted to do was go home. Well he went home alright, with a crater in his colon the size of a cutlet. Had to sit him on a cork the eighteen-hour flight home.


Posts: 1

Reply: 14

PostPosted: September 6, 2007 3:05 AM 

Hello. I have a question.

It's regarding the tune they play while Frank is telling the story of how the soldiers got food-poisoned by the food he made back in the Korean war.

Does anyone know the name for that instrumental tune?


Curly Author Profile Page
Son of Dad

Posts: 1410

Reply: 15

PostPosted: October 2, 2007 6:39 AM 

Pay attention. See reply 8.


Posts: 40

Reply: 16

PostPosted: May 21, 2008 12:52 PM 

They sure as heck didn't try to make Frank look any younger in the flashback scene. They could have found an actor that looked like a young Frank.


Posts: 1

Reply: 17

PostPosted: April 22, 2009 8:44 AM 

this song from the flashback of frank is
Barber / Adagio For Strings Op. 11

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Copyright ©2003, Mark Carey.