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The Savior of Sitcoms

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ScottyCougar







PostPosted: November 5, 2004 2:08 AM 

I would like to extend my gratitude to the critical masses on this forum. You say my ideas wouldn't work on Seinfeld , with characters I didn't create, in a world I've never been in. Well, I have arrived at the solution. I need my own show.
I have a dream. I have a dream of saving television. I have a dream of making the next great sitcom. I have a dream of saving this once great medium from the wasteland of reality TV that it has become. I have a dream of being to television comedy in the new millenium what Bruce Springsteen was to Rock and Roll in the 1970's, saving music from the insidious grasp of Disco. I have a dream that someone, somewhere in the not so distant future will say "I've seen the future of television, and its name is Scotty Cougar".
Here's the pitch: Half Seinfeld, half Simpsons, half Animaniacs, its set on the campus of a typical Midwestern University. We follow the experiences of a borderline-sociopathic young man and the colorful people in his social circle. Let's meet the characters!

Scott - Our protagonist, consider him a Generation Y Jerry Seinfeld. He's socially stunted as a result of attending an all-boys Catholic high school. His life experiences consist of having seen every episode of the Simpsons, and Seinfeld many a time, and relates most social situations to them. He has a knowledge of pop culture beyond his years, invoking obscure TV, movie, and music references that are unfamiliar to his peers. Part Charlie Brown, and part Dustin Hoffman in The Graduate, he has no particular dreams, abilities, or passions. His heroes include Bruce Springsteen, David Letterman, and Joe Buck. He claims he looks like a young Harrison Ford.
Signature Quote: "Damn kids and your rap music."

Dusty - Scott's roommate. Your typical college computer nerd. He possesses a disdain for people with lesser computer skills than himself. He often criticizes Scott for his anti-social tendancies, though he has many himself. Dusty is completely ignorant of movies, TV, sports, and the such, and is anbivalently disgusted and envious of Scott's abundance of useless knowledge.
Quote: "How the hell do you know that?"

Johnny the toilet psychiatrist - Psychology major, who seemingly resides in the handicap stall in the 2nd floor restroom. He's always there to help Scott with his problems, but a prospective patient has to work his way down to the far end of the restroom.
Quote - "Allright, that'll be 2 rolls for the hour."

Touzinsky - Neighbor of Scott and Dusty. He is often dubious about indisputable facts, and debates them to no end. Has trouble opening doors.
Quote: (After entering Scott and Dusty's) "That's a tricky door."

Vitale - Touzinsky's roommate, he's the quintissential poser, will immitate anybody and everybody to be their friend. Will resort to bribing people with cash and other materials.
Quote "Here, you want five dollars?"

BOAG - Big Overly-Aggressive Guy. The Bluto for the new millenium. He's always there to terrify his less aggressive peers. He's usually accompanied by his best friend, Mr. Taser.
Quote: (After spiking a football into a punch bowl) "The PUNCH has been SPIKED!"

Maggie - Middle school nemesis of Scott's. They renew their feud in the pilot episode. A short, stocky, brunette she wears absurdly tight pants to accentuate her oversized buttocks, leading Scott to make the joke "Those are compact ass only jeans." Always plots to sabotage any scheme of Scott's.
"I know I look great in these jeans"

What do you think? If you don't give a damn, then tell me. I'd appreciate comments and suggestions regarding a title and a theme song. Now to write the pilot....

Gendison
Bad Breaker Upper

Posts: 3306

Reply: 1



PostPosted: November 5, 2004 6:58 AM 

Um...Good luch with all THAT.

Gack
Wigmaster

Posts: 809

Reply: 2



PostPosted: November 5, 2004 7:59 AM 


well, at least you've given it a lot of thought, and you seem passionate enough about it, so i can't really make any of my usual smarmy remarks.

though i hasten to add, i doubt that most groundbreaking television shows ever began with the intention of becoming groundbreaking television shows. when you look at how casually and unassuming 'seinfeld' was conceived, or when you watch the very early episodes of 'the simpsons,' you can see that these were not people out to change the world. (or situation comedy, for that matter.)

the best things seem to happen more or less by accident.

and as an aspiring writer, myself, i can tell you that it's pretty much pointless to detail everything so much in the beginning. start with a couple characters, put them in a couple situations, and see where it takes you. humour is always better when it comes out of spontaneity rather than contrivance.

Gendison
Bad Breaker Upper

Posts: 3306

Reply: 3



PostPosted: November 5, 2004 8:16 AM 

Gack, how dare you give him advice? Scotty decided a long time ago that he's the only true genius. Anyone that doesn't "get" how incredibly talented he is doesn't realise that he's doing us a favor by ALLOWING us to read his masterpieces in the works. We must all bow down, there is no room for criticism or suggestions. Notice the use of the word "Savior". This is not a sign of a delusional Jesus complex, it is a very accurate self-assessment of his devine writing abilities.

Gack
Wigmaster

Posts: 809

Reply: 4



PostPosted: November 5, 2004 8:30 AM 


hey, i criticize jesus every day, too.

rio
Latex Salesman

Posts: 347

Reply: 5



PostPosted: November 5, 2004 8:54 AM 

[QUOTE by ScottyCougar]I have a dream. I have a dream of saving television. I have a dream of making the next great sitcom. I have a dream of saving this once great medium from the wasteland of reality TV that it has become. I have a dream of being to television comedy in the new millenium what Bruce Springsteen was to Rock and Roll in the 1970's, saving music from the insidious grasp of Disco. I have a dream that someone, somewhere in the not so distant future will say "I've seen the future of television, and its name is Scotty Cougar".[/Quote]

I had a dream that a hamburger was eating me!

J. Chiles


Posts: 5139

Reply: 6



PostPosted: November 5, 2004 10:40 AM 

Call one of the characters Scotty Luther King, or Matin Luther Mellencamp.

O'Brien
Bob Sakamano

Posts: no

Reply: 7



PostPosted: November 5, 2004 12:30 PM 

I remember reading a rule once about writing that said you should have no more than 5 characters because people get confused when there are more than that. Are these all main characters?

I would caution you about making Touzinsky too much like Kramer (bumbling/slapstick humor).

I think it is an interesting angle that "those kids with their rap music" may be able to get. You see there is a whole other generation being raised by television and it sounds like Scott (are you going to play Scott, Scotty?) is a product of this?

I think Scott should continually refer to Dusty as "Nick Burns".

I say go for it...why not?
"When the nay sayers nay you pick up your pace.
Say nothing's going to stop me so get out of my face"

Gack
Wigmaster

Posts: 809

Reply: 8



PostPosted: November 5, 2004 12:38 PM 


the first rule of writing is, we do not talk about writing.

the second rule of writing is, we do NOT talk about writing.

the third rule of writing is, there are no rules about writing. especially when it concerns the number of characters. robert altman, anybody?

Gendison
Bad Breaker Upper

Posts: 3306

Reply: 9



PostPosted: November 5, 2004 2:23 PM 

There's also another rule that says "shut your mouth and do your job". Let other people give you compliments if you deserve them. By praising yourself, it just sounds like you're trying to convince someone, and it sounds desperate. Make a million dollars an episode and then maybe you can shoot your mouth off, but by that time, you won't feel the need to because you won't have anything to prove.

O'Brien
Bob Sakamano

Posts: no

Reply: 10



PostPosted: November 5, 2004 2:32 PM 

Apparently, these pretzels are making everyone thirsty!

Gack
Bob Sakamano

Posts: no

Reply: 11



PostPosted: November 5, 2004 8:46 PM 

the furst rule of riting is. i wish'd i new how to

the sekund rule of riting is. i wish'd i new how to

the therd rule of writing is. there are no rules about writing. cause I don't know how to read & cuz My mommy wrote dis for me

Jimmy


Posts: 5505

Reply: 12



PostPosted: November 6, 2004 1:39 AM 

Jimmy will wait for the "posts on tape" version to find out what Scotty originally asked.

ScottyCougar
Master of my Domain

Posts: 91

Reply: 13



PostPosted: November 7, 2004 6:06 PM 

Ok, thanks to everybody for their comments. I'll try and make it focus on 3 or 4 main characters, and maybe add a hot chick, just for kicks.

FDR
Assistant to the Traveling Secretary

Posts: 133

Reply: 14



PostPosted: November 7, 2004 6:17 PM 

. . .

yeah, that about sums up my reaction.



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