Festivus is only a few weeks away.  It is time to start preparing.

1.  "Get the pole out of the crawl space".  Or go out and buy one.  Remember, it should be aluminum, due to the "very high strength-to-weight ratio".  Remember, "it requires no decoration". Tinsel is "distracting".

2.  "The tradition of Festivus begins with the airing of grievances."  "At the Festivus dinner, you gather your family around, and you tell them all the ways they have disappointed you over the past year."

3.  After dinner, it is time for the "Feats of Strength".  Remember, Festivus is not over until someone is pinned.

It's that simple.  No buying gifts, all you need is a pole.  No excuses.  After all, it's a "Festivus for the rest of us!".  Have you started your list of grievances yet? :-)